You Don’t Get Me

Pastors Les and Luz are BACK!! In this episode they talk about how much women and men have trouble understanding each other.

Transcript

SPEAKER_02 0:00

What's up, everybody? God bless you. Welcome back to your favorite podcast. Welcome back to my favorite podcast. What's the name of this podcast?

SPEAKER_01 0:11

Oh. Talking with purpose.

SPEAKER_02 0:17

Talking with purpose. Pastor Les with the beautiful blonde now, Pastor Lewis. And uh welcome back, guys. We said we were gonna be unfaithful to you. We did.

SPEAKER_01 0:36

We were honest.

SPEAKER_02 0:37

We were honest. So you cannot um because life be life and yeah, but you can't say nothing about it. You know, yeah. We we were dishonest to you. No, we were honest to you.

SPEAKER_01 0:48

Right. I'm like, what you're talking about.

SPEAKER_02 0:49

Yeah, we were honest to you. We said we weren't gonna be able to do every week, and we didn't. We missed one dough so far. So far. Missing one is pretty good to me. All right, so far, just missing one. But anyway, um, today's episode, we got a very specific topic that we wanted to bring, right? You wanted to bring. I were one flesh, so that we wanted to bring. And can you please tell us what that topic is, my love?

SPEAKER_01 1:18

You don't get me.

SPEAKER_02 1:20

You don't get me. I know y'all get what that means. And if you don't get what that means, then you don't get me. And that's and that's the point of this podcast. Now, just kidding, the point of this podcast, this episode is about you don't get me, right? Uh how the the concept of this was birthed was the other day we were talking, and I forgot what the conversation was about, but I was explaining to her how a man feels about a certain thing. What was it, babe? Do you remember?

SPEAKER_01 2:01

I don't remember the situation, but I remember why you were hot. Because you were saying that you were saying that I'll never understand why you're so protective of me. Oh, right. Yes. I was saying, like, I don't, like, I don't remember what the case was, but I felt like you were being extra.

SPEAKER_02 2:20

Yeah. She see, this is the thing. She felt like I was being too overprotective of her. And I told her, I don't know about any other guy, but me, I just can't. There's certain things that I have to, I am overprotective. But she thinks I'm too overprotective, right? So the point is, I was like, you're never gonna understand me. Like I told her, I could explain to you a million times. I can tell you exactly what I'm thinking and why I do what I do, but you will never fully understand me because the only one who knows is me. And that's where this bird is from. Because I turned to her, I said, you know what, babe, we should do an episode about this.

SPEAKER_01 3:13

But I feel like we won't ever understand, but it goes the same way because I tell you the same thing, you'll never understand me either. Yeah. You know what I mean? Like it's just biologically, men and women are different, and our brains work differently. We process things differently, and so that's just we gotta make it work.

SPEAKER_00 3:34

Right.

SPEAKER_01 3:35

And I I feel like we've done a great job of making that work within the last 13 years. We have our little hiccups here and there, right? Like, that's something that for me is just, and you know why, and I'm gonna explain, I'm gonna say for myself, right? Because I'm sure that there's women out there that they're like, Yeah, my husband's like that and I love it, right? Um, but for me, I was raised by a single mom, right? And so all I've known is independence. And then when um right before me and Pastor Les got married, I was also a single mom, right? And so I'm used to doing everything by myself, I'm used to not needing help, I'm used to um no one worrying about me, if that really makes sense. I mean, my mom worried, but from a man standpoint, I never had a man, right? Like I never had my father be like, oh, be careful, you know. Like I didn't have that. I didn't have a dad growing up, you know. So to hear him tell me that, right? Like, be careful with this and be careful with that, and whatever the case is, you know, um, it's it's almost like you feel like I feel like he doesn't trust me, right? Like he doesn't trust me that I can protect myself, if that makes sense, right? Um, but I know that he's doing it because he loves me, right? Right. And so um in the beginning, there were times where the enemy would put that in my head, right? Where like he doesn't trust you, and this is how he shows you that he doesn't trust you, and being someone that struggled with trust it trust issues, that was very difficult. But now that I'm past that phase, I'm like, no, he's just he loves me and he's being overprotective because he I love that he says he can't imagine life without me, right? And I say that also about you. So, you know, in reality, I don't feel I feel like we'll never fully understand each other.

SPEAKER_02 5:33

Oh, well, I think that there, you know, if you if you guys are a couple that's struggling with that, there's room for growth. And we're testament of that. You know, we could sit here and tell you a lot of things that we went through where it's like, okay, man, okay, she just meant the best for me. Um, he just meant the best for me. But yeah. But I don't know. I don't know what you're trying to say.

SPEAKER_01 5:59

My point is that everyone is different in the sense of how they view things, right? And so it a lot of it also has comes back to how you grew up. How do you were you were raised in a mother and father household, so do you think that your parents understood each other?

SPEAKER_02 6:24

Mmm, good question. Wow. I think so. I mean, I I don't I as a child, I don't remember. If you know what? As a child, they didn't. Because they split up for a little while. And we went to Puerto Rico. And we were in Puerto Rico for a little bit.

SPEAKER_01 6:47

That's where your fear of planes comes.

SPEAKER_02 6:48

That's where my fear of planes comes. That's a whole nother episode. Um so they did split up for a little while. And uh so yeah, maybe around that time then, but I would say that after that, they still had their things, I imagine. I okay, one thing I want to say, I never saw them argue until they got old.

SPEAKER_01 7:14

Oh, yeah. But their arguments were like it was petty stuff. It was yeah, super petty.

SPEAKER_02 7:19

I I never saw them argue. Growing up, I never saw them argue, not once. Yo, it was so crazy that when we got out of school and got on the plane to go to Puerto Rico, I'm like, what is going on? I didn't understand because things are great. Yeah, I'm like, what why why am I why are you signing me up for school out here? And you know, the older I got, I realized, oh, they were having some issues, right? Which is normal, but that's the way they decide. But to answer your question, when I was younger, no. As I got older, yes. And I think that happens with every couple. The longer you stay with your spouse, the more you get to understand your spouse because you spend more time with them.

SPEAKER_01 8:09

Right. And I feel like communication also plays a huge role in um understanding each other, right? Because we're we're talking about you don't get me, right? And so if you don't have good communication with your spouse, you're never gonna get each other, right? And and even if, for example, for us, even though I don't necessarily understand why he is the way he is, I trust him and I um I'm okay with it, if that makes sense, right? And so it's the same thing with with us, right? Like he'll say, like, I'll tell him, like, bro, you'll never understand, right? Because as a woman, there's things that women go through that a man will never understand, right? Like, we go through hormonal changes when we have a baby, right? Like, I'm about to be 39, so you know, things is happening, and so it's things that we change. I feel I don't know if men, I've really never studied it. I should study it. Um, I love looking into science and stuff.

SPEAKER_02 9:13

We must. I mean, if women do, men have to.

SPEAKER_01 9:16

Because women go through menopause, but I wonder, I know that men's testosterone decreases with age, but but that's it. You know, for women, it's like a whole nother thing, right? Like, you got, for example, a woman after a certain age can't have kids. Whereas a man can have kids for his whole life. Bro. You swimmer. Swimmers swim slower.

SPEAKER_02 9:45

As long as the testosterone is still working, then you could be anything and still have kids.

SPEAKER_01 9:52

There's medicine for that.

SPEAKER_02 9:54

I just is going, shoot. Um go back. Right. Um, but communication. I got a question for you though. Talking about communication, this made me a question. Made me think of a question. You asked me if you think my parents understood each other. Do you think your mother understood you in that teenage phase? And the reason why I asked you that is because right now we have two teenagers at home who I don't understand for one second. I understood them when they were kids, and now that they're men, I don't even know what they're saying.

SPEAKER_01 10:36

Yeah. But see, you don't understand them, but I feel like I do.

SPEAKER_02 10:40

No, she don't.

SPEAKER_01 10:41

Yes, I do.

SPEAKER_02 10:42

No, she don't.

SPEAKER_01 10:42

Yes, I do. Guys, we tomato, tomato.

SPEAKER_02 10:45

We do not understand them. Now, there's things we do understand, but because they vocalize what the issue is.

SPEAKER_01 10:54

Yeah, they're very vocal.

SPEAKER_02 10:56

They're very vocal. But there's other things that they don't vocalize, if they don't vocalize, those are the things that it's hard to understand because because as a parent, now you're trying to read them. They're off. What's going on? Back to back to marriage, right? I came in from work today. Let's talk about that. I came home from work today, right? And she had to step out the house real quick. So it was a quick kiss. Okay, I'll be I'll come right back. It was around down the street from the house, comes right back, and I'm sitting on the couch watching a Mets game. Let's go, Mets. And she goes, What's wrong with you? You're off. I said, Nothing. Now, I didn't realize that I was off, and there was something wrong with me, but that I also didn't realize till later on when we were on our way here. I said, Oh, wait a minute. Something happened at work. And that had me, uh. So I drive so for a living, and all those miles, it's like by midweek, I'm already like. I usually can overcome it, but for some reason today was too overwhelming. That's when I realized, oh, that's what she saw. But she asked me because she thought something was wrong.

SPEAKER_01 12:24

I asked you twice.

SPEAKER_02 12:25

Yeah, she asked me twice because she thought something was wrong.

SPEAKER_01 12:28

Because I'm like, there's no way that nothing's wrong. Like, we've been married 13 years.

SPEAKER_02 12:32

Right.

SPEAKER_01 12:33

Like, I know my husband. Especially I know my husband when he gets home from work. You know, like this wasn't your normal you.

SPEAKER_00 12:41

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 12:42

You know, like he's on the couch and he's on his phone and he's like. And I'm like, you like that? Because that's what we ask each other, like, like that. That means like you in a bad mood. I'm like, you like that? And he looks at me confused and he's like, no. And I'm like, bro, you look like you like that. So then it's like almost like he's telling me he's not, but I feel like you are. So then that makes me like that. Because I'm like, I know you lying, because I know that's something wrong with you.

SPEAKER_02 13:13

Oh, I know y'all can relate to that. It'd be a back and forth if you let it, bro.

SPEAKER_01 13:20

But again, right, like for you, you say that you you didn't realize that you were like that. Um, and or whatever, you wouldn't realize how you were you were acting or whatever. But the fact that you communicated later what you felt was going on helped me be like, oh, now I understand.

SPEAKER_02 13:38

Right? Communication goes back to where you were going.

SPEAKER_01 13:41

Right. And so understanding people, it doesn't matter who it is, right? Because you brought up the boys. It doesn't matter if you're in a relationship, it doesn't matter if it's your kids, it doesn't matter if it's your mom, if it's your dad, whoever it is, whoever it is that you don't get, talk to them.

SPEAKER_02 13:57

Yeah, figure it out.

SPEAKER_01 13:58

Like, why why is it that you do this? Why is it that you speak this way? Why is it that whatever, right? Because everything has a cause, right? Like everything that we do has a cause. It came from somewhere, it didn't just automatically happen that way, right? Right? And so, like your fear of planes, because we just talked about it, came from something that you experienced, right? And so everything that's a terrific experience in the world, everything that we do has a root cause, you know, and sometimes we don't even realize that it's trauma, yeah, you know, until we talk about it.

SPEAKER_00 14:34

Yeah, right.

SPEAKER_01 14:35

Like how many times I've sat down or we have sat down and talked to people, especially couples, and you ask them, where did that where does that come from? So everything is trauma affects us so much that when we don't get to really the the cause of it and acknowledge that that's what's going on, we can't fix it. Right. And so to us, we think that that's normal, like, oh, I've always been that way, right? Or I've I grew up that way, or whatever, but it doesn't necessarily mean that it's healthy, right? Right. Um so you know communication is is is crucial. All right. So for the next question, do you think that men struggle to be vulnerable? And oh yeah. Why?

SPEAKER_02 15:28

I'm gonna talk about me. I don't struggle with being vulnerable anymore. I could cry you a river right now. Look, watch this.

SPEAKER_00 15:42

I babe.

SPEAKER_02 15:44

But I I I don't struggle with that. But when I used to, because I did, um, my reason for struggling with it is for letting the world see a side of you that you don't want them to see. If you grew up anything like me, if you're a guy, which I hope you are, what I'm just saying, you know how things be now. Um, if you're a guy, uh and you grew up anything like me with a father that was extra manly, extra hard, you he see my dad never came to me and told me, you need to stop or don't show him more. He didn't. He just lived it. So, me being a daddy's boy all my life, I copied it. So when it came to feeling this vulnerable side of crying when I got hurt or something, I would try my best to hold it back because daddy never did it, you know? So I think that's where that comes from. We hold it back and we're scared to be vulnerable because we don't want the world or people around us to see that side of us. At least for me. That's what I think.

SPEAKER_01 17:02

Right. And I agree. And like so many people that we we say, and we've talked to so many people, and everyone is so different, and I love to see that, right? Because it exposes us to things that we would never be exposed to else, like elsewhere, you know, and so we're able to minister to people and show them that they're they can be, right? They can be vulnerable if if they're men or even if they're a woman, because women struggle with that too. That's true, depending on what you've gone through, right? Again, trauma, right? If you're someone that um if you have uh a woman that struggles with a lot of for me, for example, I had a lot of infidelity, not on my part, right? And so I struggled with trusting men, right? And so how did we break that? Honestly, it was Pastor Les when we first got married. He used to leave his phone out on like up, up everywhere, like wherever his phone was, it was up. And if he was texting, calling, whatever, he would be like, Oh, I'm talking to so-and-so, oh, whatever, right? And so for me, that showed me like, okay, he's really trying to show me that he's not like that. You know what I'm saying? And so now, 13 years in, he'd be like, Oh, I'm he still does it, and I'll be like, I do not care, right? Like he'll be like, Babe, so-and-so friend requested me, and I'm like, Ian, you ain't going nowhere. That's fine, accept it.

SPEAKER_02 18:32

And it, I think that it's because, you know, um, I cared enough to see, okay, she's struggling there. I gotta show her that I'm not like that. So I would do she never asked me to, you know, she never said, Oh, I don't trust. So I she never said this, right? Listen. Oh, I don't trust it's hard for me to trust men, so I need you. If you want me to trust you, you gotta do X, Y, and Z. She never said that. I just caught on and I just started doing it. I did it because I wanted her to see, hey man, you know, it was like, and we didn't have to talk about it. I jumped right on it because I knew what the issue was, and I said, okay, then I'm gonna show her that I'm not that way. And now, like she said, now it don't matter now. Because I'm not going nowhere. Sorry, I'm not going nowhere. I'm sorry. For whoever seems to, well, Pastor. No. No.

SPEAKER_01 19:38

Okay, we just um what do you think if you could name something, what do you think is the one thing about you that I don't understand? Or that I don't get for the sake of the title. Do we need some music?

SPEAKER_02 20:03

What do what do I think you don't get about me? Yeah. Um man, I don't think I ever really thought about it.

SPEAKER_01 20:15

How do you how you don't know? And you literally just told me the other day.

SPEAKER_02 20:19

Did I?

SPEAKER_01 20:19

You will never understand me.

SPEAKER_02 20:22

Yeah, but I don't know. I I don't see again, we I have to know what happened.

SPEAKER_01 20:27

I don't remember.

SPEAKER_02 20:28

I don't remember.

SPEAKER_01 20:29

I just remember you were being overprotective.

SPEAKER_02 20:32

Okay, oh, okay. That's one. Let's put that. That's one. And I think that's helping me think now. So you'll never understand. Oh, you'll never understand how much I love you.

SPEAKER_01 20:45

That's true.

SPEAKER_02 20:46

I always tell you that.

SPEAKER_01 20:48

You always say that.

SPEAKER_02 20:49

I always tell her, oh, you're never gonna get it.

SPEAKER_01 20:53

And you always he always says that he loves me more than I love him.

SPEAKER_02 20:58

Yes, I I believe so. I do. I believe that I love her more than she loves me. It doesn't mean that she don't love me. She loves me. But my love for her, I know it's stronger than her. I wonder why I think that.

SPEAKER_01 21:16

I don't know. Because it's not like that.

SPEAKER_02 21:18

Wow, this is man, this is cutting me deep, bro. This ain't cool. It's supposed to be a pod for other people, not for me. I think it's turning into a uh a session for me. No, but really, I I I don't like it's not like I don't dream bad.

SPEAKER_01 21:35

No, no.

SPEAKER_02 21:35

So I don't know why I say, I don't know why I say maybe it could be from the beginning.

SPEAKER_01 21:41

Maybe our marriage was rough in the beginning.

SPEAKER_02 21:44

Our marriage was very rough in the beginning. I think that you know what? That is where it came from. Because I'm like, man, I love her, man. Why this ain't working out? And she used to always have this resting face. I still do, and I oh yeah, but more back then. Then and I thought that she was always mad, but she wasn't. And I'm like, bro, you okay? Yeah, I'm fine. What you mean you're fine? You're lying to me, man. No, no, but oh my god, it was a mess. So I always felt like, man, I'm trying to show her more that I love her than she's trying to show me. But it's just because it was Rocky, it was the beginning, we didn't know each other like that.

SPEAKER_01 22:23

We got married three months after meeting. We got married or four months because you canceled the wedding.

SPEAKER_02 22:27

Yeah. We got married four months after. I talked about that today.

SPEAKER_01 22:31

What woo with George. Oh, you did? Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 22:34

We uh touched on it a little bit.

SPEAKER_01 22:35

You told him how you broke up with me?

SPEAKER_02 22:37

Yeah, I told him. I was like, yeah, man. It would have been earlier, but I broke up with her. And he was like, that was funny. But uh, yeah, I think that I would say that. What about you?

SPEAKER_01 22:50

Well, I think that you will never understand about me.

SPEAKER_02 22:55

Can I answer one? Your hormones.

SPEAKER_01 22:58

That's for sure. But I think that's any guy, to be honest. Like, I don't think, I genuinely don't think that any man will ever understand a woman's hormones.

SPEAKER_02 23:08

I'm gonna say something.

SPEAKER_01 23:09

Go ahead.

SPEAKER_02 23:10

Guys, her body hates me. And we're gonna leave it at that. Fill in the blanks. Her system. Let's, yeah, no, no, let's give them a little more. Her system hates me. It looks at me and says, no way.

SPEAKER_01 23:28

Not tonight.

SPEAKER_02 23:29

Not tonight. Not for a week. No. And it's not her, it's her body, bro. Her body. She's laughing because she knows it's true. It's crazy. Nah, but on a more serious note, because that is serious.

SPEAKER_01 23:48

That is definitely true, though.

SPEAKER_02 23:50

Uh a more serious note, yes. I don't I think that men struggle with understanding the women's hormones. The up and down, the swing of this. Good mood, two seconds later, she wanna rip things off the hinges. And it's like, dang, bro.

SPEAKER_01 24:10

Yeah. Like there's been times where Pastor Les will be like, bro, you look at me like you hate me. And it's and it's not even that. It's just there's moments in our cycle where everybody is getting on my nerves. Like you don't even, I'm yelling at the dogs. Why I'm yelling at the dog? He just sniffed my leg. Like, and I'm like, like, I'm like, everything, everything is annoying.

SPEAKER_02 24:38

And I don't know. You ain't the only one though. I know for sure.

SPEAKER_01 24:40

Oh, I know I'm not the only one that that that goes through that. But but my point is, is that as a man that doesn't go through a cycle, right? You're like, what is going on with her, right? Like, that's where I have the time here.

SPEAKER_00 24:56

Sorry.

SPEAKER_01 24:57

You know, as a man that doesn't have a cycle, you don't understand. Right. So that's something that you'll never understand. And I think that um the reason why you also feel like you love me more than I love you is because my way of showing love is differently than his way of showing love.

SPEAKER_02 25:14

Oh my gosh, yes, that's true.

SPEAKER_01 25:17

So, right, and again, you don't get me. Understanding each other's love language is so crucial, right? Les is very um affectionate. He loves hugging, he loves holding hands, he loves cuddling, he loves kissing, and like he his number one is physical touch, right? Um but for me, that's not how I show love. Um, but it comes from giving you your love language, which is quality time. Yes.

SPEAKER_02 25:50

Because when you give when I give her the quality time, she opens up. It's a different person.

SPEAKER_01 25:57

Yeah. But that comes from again, right? Everything has a root cause, right? And so for me, growing up without a dad, right, I I don't know what a healthy relationship looks like, right? And then on top of that, my um what I went through as a teen mom and everything like that, right? So the men that I did give my all to in that way hurt me. So that created a barrier for me, and so like I don't even do it on purpose, guys. I really I genuinely don't, but I got used to it, right? Like I got used to being that person, and so to me it's it's normal. At this point, that's just how I am. Um, and I try, I do try. Like, let's be like, the other day we were walking, we were walking, I think, inside Walmart, and I grabbed his hand, and he was like, You saw that girl looking at me, that's why you grabbed my hand. I was like, bro, get off.

SPEAKER_02 26:54

I was trying to find out. Wait, hold on, what happened here, bro? This is random.

SPEAKER_01 26:58

I'm like, get mad. I was like, I let go of his hand. I'm like, forget it. I'm over here trying to be all affectionate.

SPEAKER_02 27:03

Yeah, I misread that. I misread that one because there is there is some times that that has happened. Don't lie.

SPEAKER_01 27:11

I'm not, I didn't say I'm not saying that.

SPEAKER_02 27:14

She would catch a woman looking at me and she'll grab my hand, like, it's mine.

SPEAKER_01 27:19

Right. And I'd be like, I'm like, people don't got no chill. Like, they do not care.

SPEAKER_02 27:23

She's mad crazy.

SPEAKER_01 27:25

Anyways. Um last question. Another question? All right, let's see. Um what okay, if there's one thing that you would want any woman to understand about men, what would that be?

SPEAKER_02 27:46

Give him a break. Don't be so hard on him. He's trying his best to understand you. You're making it hard for him to understand you too. So I want you to realize that you're making it hard for him to understand you. Make it easier by communicating to him what the root issue about this, you not understanding him or you guys not understanding each other, but from your end, make him understand what it is. And I'm telling you, if they're anything like me, once they hear it, they're gonna pay attention and work on that. Help you through that. Help, you know, help them understand it, man. That's the that's the best advice I could give them. Please help your husband understand why you find one second, the next second, you don't even want to look at him. Help them understand that. Because, you know, when it when it happens, when it happens, it doesn't it doesn't happen as bad as it used to. But so let me talk about before. When it used to happen, I felt like I wasn't loved, bro.

SPEAKER_00 29:04

Mm-hmm.

SPEAKER_02 29:04

I'm like, she hates me. I've gotten ugly now. You feel, oh snap. Yeah, there's nothing I can do. This means that physically she's unattracted to me. Emotionally, she's not there, and it's all my fault. That's how men feel. So, women, please communicate that issue. Talk. Let him know, yo, babe, it's not you. It's me, and this is what it is. And I'm pretty sure 100%, man, I would say 100%. 100%, they'll work on really understanding you. What about you?

SPEAKER_01 29:45

Can I add to that real quick? Yeah. I would say also be honest. Because there's times where I'm in a bad mood and I genuinely don't know why. Like, I was and I'll straight up tell, he'll be like, what's wrong? And I'm like, I don't know.

SPEAKER_00 29:57

Right.

SPEAKER_01 29:58

Like, I genuinely don't know. I just, this is how I feel right now, and I try not to get caught up in my feelings, right? Um, but I'm human, right? Like, don't even sit here and be like, oh, you're a pastor, and you be like that. Yes, I do be like that, right? Catch me too. Catch me on a bad day.

SPEAKER_02 30:15

And me too. Catch me on a bad day.

SPEAKER_01 30:17

You're gonna see loose. You ain't gonna see pastor.

SPEAKER_02 30:19

And you're gonna see less. You ain't gonna see past.

SPEAKER_01 30:21

I hate that that people automatically are like, oh, you're a pastor, so you have to. I don't have to, nothing.

SPEAKER_02 30:26

Yeah, I don't have to. Right?

SPEAKER_01 30:28

Like, I'm not I'm not gonna sugarcoat anything. I'm not gonna be different because that's fake. Right? Like, and that's why people have the the connotation of pastors that they do, because they're not real. Like pastors aren't real. They they it's a facade.

SPEAKER_02 30:42

Some pastors are very right, rent over.

SPEAKER_01 30:46

Um for the men, I would say, um, I'm speaking to the women. Who am I talking to?

SPEAKER_02 30:57

Men and women.

SPEAKER_01 30:58

No, you gave advice to the women. The women to understand the men.

SPEAKER_02 31:03

So now you do a review.

SPEAKER_01 31:05

Okay, so the men to understand the women. Got you. Um, so I would say be compassionate and have empathy. Because that's good.

SPEAKER_02 31:15

It's a big word. So real big word.

SPEAKER_01 31:18

Get out of here.

SPEAKER_02 31:19

Empathy.

SPEAKER_01 31:19

Okay, Prue.

unknown 31:21

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 31:21

That's what he's saying. That's a real big word.

SPEAKER_01 31:23

Um, because us as women, sometimes we don't even understand what's going on, right? And so we go through hormonal changes and we can't even help ourselves. So for the man to continuously ask, what's wrong, right? And you're like, I don't know. When we say I don't know, genuinely trust me that it's a I don't know.

SPEAKER_00 31:44

Right.

SPEAKER_01 31:44

Because after I had our last baby, Anjareli, I went through really bad postpartum depression. And so when I tell you I didn't know, I didn't know. You know what I'm saying? And so that's all I can say is just try your best to really hear her because that's all you can do is listen, right? Like you're never, you're never gonna understand. But at least if we feel like you're listening to us, it helps. It helps so much.

SPEAKER_02 32:13

Yeah. Listen. Men, listen to her. Women, listen to him. Listen to each other. Because we're never really gonna get to fully understand each other. But if we listen, we'll know where to start.

SPEAKER_01 32:31

Right.

SPEAKER_02 32:32

Come on, that's good.

SPEAKER_01 32:33

That's good, Pastor.

SPEAKER_02 32:34

That's really good.

SPEAKER_01 32:35

So if you guys also need any, um, we do uh faith-based coaching, right? Yes, we do. So we deal with marriages. If you guys are having a hard time in your marriage, please don't struggle alone. We're here to help. Right. We also offer individual coaching. The women can reach out to me, the men can reach out to Pastor Les. Yes. And you know, we're here. We're here for you guys, and we trust me that we get it. We understand life be life in, and not everyone understands life, right?

SPEAKER_02 33:09

And and I want to add, we don't know it all.

SPEAKER_01 33:11

We sure don't.

SPEAKER_02 33:12

Uh but we got we got some cushion, as they say. We got some experience, and uh I we we're at the point now where it's like, look, we figured something out. Let's help people figure it out.

SPEAKER_01 33:27

Right.

SPEAKER_02 33:28

So if you're really trying to figure it out, man, if you're really trying to figure it out, hit me up, man. If you women, if you're really trying to figure it out, please hit up Pastor Lewis or joint. Just message us, man. Contact us, don't stay there. Try to do something about it. Save your marriage. You loved each other, you tied the knot, don't slip that knot open.

SPEAKER_01 33:56

That's good. And that's a wrap, folks.

SPEAKER_02 34:04

That is.

SPEAKER_01 34:05

And we'll see you when we see y'all.

SPEAKER_02 34:07

Yeah. Maybe next week. Let me tell you something before I finish. Let me tell you something.

SPEAKER_01 34:12

Oh no, it won't be next week because I work on Thursday.

SPEAKER_02 34:14

No, listen, let me tell you something, viewer. I'm not obligated to you.

SPEAKER_01 34:18

Right. Y'all do not pay the bills.

SPEAKER_02 34:20

Y'all don't pay the bills. Y'all don't pay my bills. I'ma come back whenever I feel like I could come back. And then you see us here doing an episode. Until then, sorry, but that's the way it is. God bless you. Thank you so much for viewing. And uh, yo, do me a favor, like, comment, and share.

SPEAKER_01 34:40

And subscribe if you haven't.

SPEAKER_02 34:42

And subscribe, right? If you haven't. And we're gonna start posting more reels. Yo, push those, share those to push them up the algorithm, man. We're trying to help people here. This ain't about views. Yeah, views. This is about helping. Okay? So God bless you. Thank you. And Pastor Luz is mine. Only mine. No shares.

SPEAKER_01 35:10

No, nobody wants me.

SPEAKER_02 35:11

No shares. You'll be surprised. No shares. Mine forever. Okay? God bless you.